Water cooler: When a spouse calls a recruiter

Think of the most cringeworthy follow-up you’ve received from a job applicant. How bad does it make you squirm? Now, imagine the follow-up came from the applicant’s wife.

That recently happened to a Montreal-based recruiter named Dawn Williams—and apparently isn’t as rare as one might think. After posting about it on Twitter, other recruiters responded with tales of spouses (or parents) of applicants reaching out on their behalf.

We had to know more, so we spoke to Williams, president and sales recruiter at staffing firm Sirius Personnel, who said she receives messages from applicants’ wives multiple times a year.

“I’ve had many, many wives looking for their husbands,” she told HR Brew. She also noted that the outreach isn’t limited to emails or just for entry-level positions—she has received phone calls, too, and follow-ups for tenured roles during her 16-year recruiting career.

Beyond the cringe. While outreach from an applicant’s spouse may make a recruiter snicker, wince, or just hit “delete,” Williams recommended HR leaders respond with empathy. “Tell them, ‘I really don’t want to discuss this with you. I would rather discuss this with your husband directly,’” she said, adding that she tries to keep an open mind.

However, Williams suggests that recruiters should view outreach from a wife or significant other as a potential red flag for the applicant. “If you can’t even put the effort into looking for the job, why should I put the effort into doing everything else to help you find a job?” she asked.

What about you, readers? Have you received phone calls from the spouses of applicants, or even those of existing employees? Let us know by responding to this email.—KP

Do you work in HR or have information about your HR department we should know? Email [email protected]. For completely confidential conversations, ask Kristen for her number on Signal.